i don't need another hero

i wrote this piece because i had a "friend" who always wanted to save me. i didn't need saving. but i remembered it because greg read job 2:11-13 in the english club meeting. to summarize, job was being tested and his friends came to see him. observing his plight from afar they tore their clothes and cried in lamentation. once they were upon him, they said nothing for seven days, they just sat there with him. they felt his grief was too great for words. greg also said something about how sometimes you don't need help or advice or anything like that, you just need your friends to be there for you... this poem is old but it resonates. enjoy it and shit.


i don't need another hero (job 2:11-13 kjv)
sometimes all i need is an " i understand nikki"
without the but
without the advice that looms just beyond the acknowledgement of understanding
if you understood then you'd know that i don't want advice
i don't want you to save the day
i just want you to be okay with me not knowing what to do next
with the hopelessness and the confusion
the anger and the sadness
i know that oftentimes i do the same thing
i rush to aid you with metaphors for life
and anecdotes
and buddhist rhetoric
but it's only because i'm motivated as you are
by an inner longing for you to never hurt
never cry
never be lost or confused or lonely
even though i know
we must all be at some time
it's a silly cycle of good intentions
i stand here, a townsville with powderpuff girls
i know what to do when shit hits the fan
i do
at least i think i do
and even if i don't let me stumble a bit
it's all a part of the process
i just
for once
want to tell you all the gory details
and know that you want to hear them
and you're not just trying to advise me to
shut me up
i'd rather listen to an hour's worth of your details
than dispense an hour's worth of "i thinks, you shoulds" or the like
i don't need another hero
smallville don't need wonderwoman
wherever the hulk was don't need spiderman
i have friends.
i need friends
not capn save a hoe and crew.
stop trying to save me and start listening to me
really listening.
like i listen to you.

a thug in my eye

my mom saw me today and said i looked like a thug to her, so i began to wonder how people viewed me today. i had on a XL southpole shirt, some pure white dickies and some black air force ones. was playing around with some words- came up with this piece:


his shirt was so big
maybe an XL when what
he really needed was a medium.
those pants hung to the ground
like a sweater
on a weak wire hanger
in the summer time-
untouched
not really in place,
and his car was clean
BOOM-BOOM-BOOM
his radio blasted.
the bass surrounded me-
felt like I lived in the subwoofer
in the trunk of his car;
like the old lady in the shoe.
his shoes were jet black-
the color of rubber tires
when armor all is applied to them-
clean,
the first thing others noticed.
and his jewelry- so simple yet so elegant;
an old horse with a new saddle.
not too much.
just enough to let you know
that he enjoyed looking good,
enjoyed the eyes that peered at him
from across the parking lot.
a thug in my eye.
his style, his swagger, his confidence-
untouchable;
like he had something nobody else did.
were my eyes deceiving me?
he carried a Bible.
where did this come from
i wonder
a thug in my eye-
or maybe not.
educated black man?
looking good,
well groomed,
confident,
knowing where his life is headed;
deciphered those things
that were once hieroglyphics
and used them-
applied them to everyday life.
an exception to the stereotype,
exception- this type.
got way more than i bargained for-
thought i had a good deal.
F . E . A . R
false expectations apparing real.
i was fooled.
i was wrong.
i know better.
i know him now.
i know his intentions.
i see his motives.
i see his mother.
i see his brothers.
i like this guy.
i love this guy.
i AM this guy.

a thug in my eye

sharing a little know-ledge

okay, you all know that i'm engaged in we real cool at the present time. i should be finished by now, but for a lack of excuses i'll just say that i just really got started today. in the preface, i came across a name, FRED HAMPTON, and i'm thinking that the name sounded familiar so i went and googled it and came across one of his speeches. for some reason, it made me think of the underground family. this is what he said:

Fred Hampton, speech (1968)


A lot of people get the word revolution mixed up and they think revolutions a bad word. Revolution is nothing but like having a sore on your body and then you put something on that sore to cure that infection. I'm telling you that we're living in a sick society. We're involved in a society that produces criminals, thieves and robbers and rapers. Whenever you are in a society like that, that is a sick society.

We're gonna organize and dedicate ourselves to revolutionary political power and teach ourselves the specific needs of resisting the power structure, arm ourselves, and we're gonna fight reactionary pigs with international proletarian revolution. That's what it has to be.

We have to understand very clearly that there's a man in our community called a capitalist. Sometimes he's Black and sometimes he's white. But that man has to be driven out of our community because anybody who comes into the community to make profit off of people by exploiting them can be defined as a capitalist.


that's some real stuff! just wanted to let my revolutionaries in on some revolution shit.

back to your regularly scheduled program...
2/14/06

what i had meant to say was

just in case y'all read my comments to greg's from the yard posts...i love greg and appreciate his passion about making the magazine a success... but i had to get on his ass cause he is not and i repeat notfinna be naggin my ass in person and on the net about something i said i was gonna do. now for the rest of you, get on ya din. and if you didn't see nathan's freedom story punch yourself in the mouth.

from the yard, pt. 2

i didn't want anybody to be offended by my last post, so i felt the need to come back and formally tell all of you what i was trying to say. i am anxious about this year's publication of the literary magazine, however it is very difficult to get across to niggas that i need the shit before the deadline hits. uh oh, going back into insane greg (woosah, woosah). but if it is not too much of a hassle will you intelligent people please begin sending me your entries. i know that i will be bombarded with a lot of bs from people all over the campus, but i have high expectations from my classmates and friends. think about it- this can be our way of getting our stuff published. not trying to be selfish or anything like that, but we are the cream of the crop. let's show everyone else how to do it.

lean wit it, rock wit it and all that, but don't forget about your boy- aiight!

peace and love
the gregster

from the yard...work and a lot of progress needed!!

deadline for from the yard entries is february 15, 2006.
submit
submit
submit
bitches!

it's never my intention to discourage you, rather to encourage you...so submit to my shit dammit!!!

H.B.C.U

Helping Blacks Create Unity

Coming to Fort Valley State University has taught me so many things. First and foremost, it's shown me that when black people want to have a celebration, we really know how to do so. As the time draws near for me to leave Fort Valley, which has been my home for the past four years, I reflect upon the good times that my friends and I had during homecoming. It was like a family reunion, but this time the family was bigger than I had ever imagined. I was blown away during my freshman year because it was my first time ever attending a homecoming event. I walked to State University Drive, which had been deemed, "The Strip," and thought to myself, "What.The.F*ck." It was total madness, but I knew that it would be something that I would grow to appreciate for the rest of my life.

And to think that I almost missed out on all of the things I've experienced down here in the valley. My first choice was Clark Atlanta. I was 18 at the time I had to make my college decision, and leaving mom and dad behind in Macon just wasn't happening. I guess you could say I was a bit afraid, but then I already had a couple of friends in the valley who assured me that the experiences that I would have at Clark Atlanta University would be fairly similar to those I would have at Fort Valley State University. It was all going to be a black experience. I wouldn't say I was coerced, but I was persuaded by the best persuaders and I ended up being here- the place that would become my alma mater, the place I would grow to love and cherish.

I've met so many people that I truly love, so many people that I'm glad came into my life. There is so much talent on these campuses, but people have all of their energy focused in the wrong place. Instead of trying their hardest to make it to class on time and turn in assignments on time, people (myself not excluded) try their hardest to get to the club on time or buy this outfit before it goes off of sale. Black is where it's at. I can't even imagine what it would be like never to have experienced what I have received here at FVSU. And I know that there are so many others like me. It's time for us to help our black people create a sense of unity. Instead of working against one another we need to work together. Imagine that. And nobody could stop us. No, I'm not trying to start a new panther party, but we need to start a revolution. A revolution where our brothers and sisters care about the education that children get in public school because right now I can truly say that I'm disappointed.

As I further my education after graduation, I can only expect the best. My first choice of law school is Howard University's School of Law (of course) but I will be submitting my application to Georgia State. It's not my first choice, but I'm expecting the best. Fort Valley turned out as a good experience, and I'm hoping the trend will continue as I pack my things and head to Atlanta.

SURVEY SAYS!!!

IF YOU COULD TRAVEL BACK IN A TIME MACHINE TO ANY PAST DECADE OR TIME ERA, WHICH WOULD IT BE AND WHY? WHAT WOULD YOU DO THERE AND WHAT TYPES OF SOUVENIERS MIGHT YOU BRING BACK WITH YOU?
The Black Power Movement. Because I’m all about some Black Power. I would definitely be a PANTHER. I’d bring back some super afro grow type ish.

IF YOU BELIEVE IN THE "END OF THE WORLD", WHEN DO YOU THINK IT IS COMING AND WHAT IS THE REASON FOR THAT BELIEF? WHAT WILL THE "END" CONSIST OF?
It’s coming once lil George busts this nut he’s been working so hard for. Metaphorically of course.


IF YOU COULD COMMUNICATE WITH ALL THE ANIMALS/INSECTS OF THE WORLD AND COMMAND THEM TO DO ANYTHING, WHAT WOULD YOU TALK ABOUT OR WHAT KIND OF STUFF WOULD YOU HAVE THEM DO FOR YOU?
I’d ask them why the hell they see me coming and don’t get out of the way. And I’d make them attack random ass white people for my enjoyment.

IN THE FUTURE,WHEN ROBOTS ARE MORE COMMONLY OWNED BY EVERYDAY PEOPLE LIKE YOU AND ME, WOULD YOU FEEL COMFORTABLE ENLISTING A ROBO-NANNY TO CARE FOR YOUR LITTLE ONES (ASSUMING YOU HAD LITTLE ONES)? WHY OR WHY NOT?
I won’t have one. Can’t nobody beat my kids like me.



DO YOU BELIVE IN ALIEN LIFE FORMS? WHAT DO THEY LOOK LIKE (BE SPECIFIC), WHAT ARE THEIR INTENTIONS? DO THEY FRIGHTEN YOU? ALSO, WHAT DO YOU THINK THEY LIKE TO EAT ..DO YOU THINK THEY WOULD LIKE PIZZA?
Yes. White people. To destroy anything of color. Yes. They like to eat everything that’s why they’re forever on tv trying to make themselves over. I know they would. The bitches invented it.


WHICH BANDS OR MUSICIANS ARE YOU EMBARRASSED ABOUT LIKING OR HAVING LIKED IN THE PAST?
None. How can I be embarrassed about what I like.


IF YOU COULD BE THE WORLD'S GREATEST MARTIAL ARTIST OR THE WORLD'S GREATEST LAWYER, WHICH WOULD YOU BE AND WHY?
Martial Artist because somebody’s child is forever trying me.


IF IT WAS DISCOVERED THAT EATING HUMAN BRAINS WOULD GIVE YOU A DRAMATIC INCREASE IN INTELLIGENCE,LIFE SPAN AND STRENGTH (NOT TO MENTION STAMINA AND VIRILITY)WOULD YOU EAT IT? WOULD YOU WANT TO KNOW WHO'S BRAIN YOU WERE EATING? WHAT DO YOU SUPPOSE IT TASTES LIKE? HOW WOULD YOU PREPARE IT?
Uhm… yeah probably. But not some damn test tube baby or some retard. I need a brain that’s BETTER than the one I currently have. I guess if I can eat chit’lins I can eat a brain… I’d cook it however Hannibal the cannibal says is best… with beans and rice maybe?

WHY DID THE DINOSAURS BECOME EXTINCT ANYWAYS???
Because they couldn’t stand white people.

black like me

this was an excerpt from the book i'm reading. thought it was interesting.

Night coming tenderly
Black like me.

The night was always a comfort. Most of the whites were in their homes. The threat was less. A Negro blended inconspicuously into the darkness.

At such a time, the Negro can look at the starlit skies and find that he has, after all, a place in the universal order of things. The stars, the black skies affirm his humanity, his validity as a human being. He knows that his belly, his lungs, his tired legs, his appetites, his prayers and his mind are cherished in some profound involvement with nature and God. The night is his consolation. It does not despise him.